FairyDust_and_Drums

i was so pissed off last night…
then when i thought i’ll be having a great morning— i got pissed off too.

i got to the point i was literally shaking from what i was feeling.

then suddenly i realized this has got to stop– i mean am i to let emotions rule me? control me? or the other way around— i knew that i had to stop and not think of this person who i feel have wronged me…

despite what she did, i have to say there is no ruling out that she is still a friend.
Now i know the meaning of "giving till it hurts"… but sometimes as much as you want to help… di maiiwasan na sasagi sa utak mo na baka naabuso ka na.

ang sama ko noh? na ganun ang naiisip ko na— imbis na napapabuti ako at nag grow– parang paurong ata— nag sisimula na magtanim nang hurt—-

so that was when i decided– GOD BAHALA KA NA PO SA KANYA… bless her so she’ll bless others. Give me patience and mahabang understanding. hehehe

sana tulungan mo po siya sa mga desisyon niya, huwag niyo po siya pababayaan…

amen

tulog na ako

hehehe

wait… that sounded NASTY..

ok this is totally a GP blog- no [bleep...bleep] here!

remember those nights when you would go home from college and just do whatever– surf the net, dvd marathon, take a luxurious shower, spend time in the gym and DRIVE home… i have my laptop with me, and if i feel like it– i would stop by starbucks for my fav. peppermint tea (ok maybe not starbucks but coffee bean..)

anyways, now its a whole different ballgame.

i go home at around 7:30-ish, i take the FX and then the JEEP— no laptop or i’ll risk getting mugged. No more fancy outfits— coz if you dont want to get noticed—its a must to look scary yourself hehehehe (or maybe that is JUST MY perception)… no more cars, nothing to carry my backpack anymore directly affecting tuloy my gym life….

dont take this as complaining–it just makes me appreciate more what i used to have. Now, i feel so frugal that sometimes i literally cry my eyes out– naawa lang ako minsan sa sarili ko (which is hilarious at the same time kaya habang umiyak– tumatawa din ako) wait… weird no?

anyways, its a training for me— all i think of is how my mom and dad went through the same thing when they were young— commuting, working, pinch penny-ing (if there is such a word)… the only difference then and now is that now the percentage of getting mugged is higher—

so anyways… i left work 8:30-ish and got home 10— kamusta naman di ba? sana matagalan ko pa ganito pag commute— i love my work, i love the people, i love my job… but im really geting tired of commuting minsan—its not me… but sacrifice sacrifice sacrifice– kayanin dapat di ba?

….sniff* sniff*…